Crestfallen. That is the word that embodies how some of Alberta's health workers are feeling during the vicious 4th wave of the COVID-19 pandemic.
 
Alyson, who asked that her last name not be used, is a healthcare worker in Alberta. She worked in long-term care during the previous waves of the pandemic.
 
"I've lost empathy for the people who are choosing to ignore our health recommendations," she said. "That's the hardest part, to admit that as a nurse since we're supposed to love and we're supposed to care."
 
She said that there are obvious signs of mental health distress amongst healthcare workers, including herself.
 
"I feel exhausted. I feel like we're going back and forth," she said. "Things slowly get better, then two weeks later, then we're shutting down again. It never ends."
 
Working in long-term care, Alyson saw the gut-wrenching effects that lockdowns had on residents. She said that because most people in long-term care are already dealing with early dementia and increased confusion, the isolation during the pandemic was devastating.
 
"When you're all in your PPE (personal protective equipment), you can't recognize people because you're all in your gowns, your mask, your face shields," Alyson said. "How do you think the residents feel when they can't recognize these people who are coming into their room, especially residents who are confined to their rooms?"  
 
Outbreaks of COVID-19 in long-term care facilities have recently been less frequent in comparison to pre-vaccination days, but Alyson says there is a direct correlation between the lessening of outbreaks and residents of long-term health facilities being vaccinated. 
 
Her frustration with those who are currently unvaccinated is palpable. It has even caused rifts in her relationships with friends.
 
"One of my best friends is choosing not to get the COVID-19 vaccine," she said. "I almost want to scream and say, 'look at our ICU admission, look at the statistics, almost 90 per cent of those admissions are in unvaccinated people."
Recently, she has switched from long-term care to home care.
 
"In long-term care, I saw it [the effects of the pandemic], it was so prevalent, it was so exhausting," she said. "That's one of the reasons I left long-term care because I just couldn't do it anymore."
 
While Alyson was fortunate enough not to contract COVID-19, Rahul Kapil, a Licensed Practical Nurse (LPN) was not nearly as lucky.
 
"I would say I was near death," Kapil said. "It was a horrible, horrible experience."
 
Kapil, 47, spent 10 days in the hospital with COVID-19, last January.
 
"My oxygen saturation was very low and it was hard to breathe, like someone squeezing my chest," he said. "I had nosebleeds too."
 
Kapil currently administers COVID-19 vaccinations to the public. He said that there are mixed emotions among those coming in to get the vaccine.
 
"I would say a lot of people are very happy to get the vaccine," he said. " A few of them, they are cautious, they're worried about what the long-term side effects are."
 
Some people who are still on the fence about getting the vaccine tend to wait until friends or family get poked first, to see if there's any adverse reaction. Kapil said that apart from explaining the short-term side-effects of the vaccine, he also gets personal and tells his story of contracting COVID-19.
"It does convince them, yes," he said. 
 
Kapil says that almost a year later he experiences what he thinks are lingering side effects of COVID-19. 
 
"I feel thirsty all the time," he said. "I drink water every day, all the time, and I am still thirsty."
 
On October 1st, 2021, it was reported that a Calgary ICU and ER nurse, Season Foremsky, died of a suspected drug overdose. Her family confirmed to CTV news that the nurse had been the target of abuse and harassment while she worked on the frontlines during the pandemic. 
 
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